{1}{1}23.976
{1102}{1150}Shrek 2001 English
{1150}{1267}[ MAN ] Once upon a time|there was a lovely princess.
{1269}{1359}But she had an enchantment|upon her of a fearful sort...
{1361}{1478}which could only be broken|by love's first kiss.
{1480}{1536}She was locked away|in a castle...
{1538}{1639}guarded by a terrible|fire-breathing dragon.
{1641}{1746}Many brave knights had attempted|to free her from this dreadful prison,
{1748}{1814}but none prevailed.
{1816}{1868}She waited in|the dragon's keep...
{1870}{1940}in the highest room|of the tallest tower...
{1942}{2051}for her true love|and true love's first kiss.
{2053}{2124}[ LAUGHING ]|Like that's ever gonna happen.
{2126}{2216}- [ PAPER RUSTLING, TOILET FLUSHES ]|- What a load of...
{2218}{2328}♪ Somebody once told me ♪|♪ the world is gonna roll me ♪
{2330}{2425}♪ I am not the sharpest tool ♪|♪ in the shed ♪
{2427}{2545}♪ She was looking kind of dumb ♪|♪ with her finger and her thumb ♪
{2547}{2636}♪ In the shape of an L ♪|♪ on her forehead ♪
{2638}{2708}♪ The years start coming ♪|♪ and they don't stop coming ♪
{2710}{2778}♪ Fed to the rules ♪|♪ and I hit the ground running ♪
{2780}{2834}♪ Didn't make sense ♪|♪ not to live for fun ♪
{2836}{2889}♪ Your brain gets smart ♪|♪ but your head gets dumb ♪
{2891}{2937}♪ So much to do ♪|♪ So much to see ♪
{2939}{3001}♪ So what's wrong with ♪|♪ taking the back streets ♪
{3003}{3052}♪ You'll never know ♪|♪ if you don't go ♪
{3054}{3113}♪ You'll never shine ♪|♪ if you don't glow ♪
{3115}{3161}♪ Hey, now ♪|♪ You're an all-star ♪
{3163}{3220}♪ Get your game on, go play ♪
{3222}{3316}♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪|♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪
{3318}{3413}♪ And all that ♪|♪ glitters is gold ♪
{3415}{3545}♪ Only shooting stars ♪|♪ break the mould ♪
{3547}{3597}♪ It's a cool place ♪|♪ and they say it gets colder ♪
{3599}{3652}♪ You're bundled up now ♪|♪ but wait till you get older ♪
{3653}{3702}♪ But the meteor men ♪|♪ beg to differ ♪
{3704}{3753}♪ Judging by the hole ♪|♪ in the satellite picture ♪
{3753}{3817}♪ The ice we skate ♪|♪ is getting pretty thin ♪
{3819}{3874}♪ The water's getting warm ♪|♪ so you might as well swim ♪
{3874}{3914}♪ My world's on fire ♪|♪ How 'bout yours ♪
{3916}{3980}♪ That's the way I like it ♪|♪ and I'll never get bored ♪
{3982}{4045}♪ - Hey, now, you're an all-star ♪|♪ - [ SHOUTING ] ♪
{4047}{4133}♪ Get your game on, go play ♪
{4135}{4210}♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪|♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪
{4212}{4301}♪ And all that ♪|♪ glitters is gold ♪
{4303}{4421}♪ Only shooting stars ♪|♪ break the mould ♪
{4423}{4484}[ BELCHES ]
{4515}{4561}- Go!|- Go!
{4563}{4638}- [ RECORD SCRATCHING ]|- Go. Go. Go.
{4640}{4701}♪ Hey, now ♪|♪ You're an all-star ♪
{4703}{4777}♪ Get your game on, go play ♪
{4779}{4881}♪ Hey, now, you're a rock star ♪|♪ Get the show on, get paid ♪
{4883}{4976}♪ And all that ♪|♪ glitters is gold ♪
{4978}{5105}♪ Only shooting stars ♪|♪ break the mould ♪
{5218}{5296}- Think it's in there?|- AI right. Let's get it!
{5298}{5364}Whoa. Ho Id on. Do you know|what that thing can do to you?
{5366}{5437}Yeah, it'll grind|your bones for its bread.
{5439}{5534}[ LAUGHS ] Yes, well, actually,|that would be a giant.
{5536}{5633}Now, ogres... They're much worse.
{5635}{5705}They'll make a suit|from your freshly peeled skin.
{5707}{5757}- No!|- They'll shave your liver.
{5759}{5837}Squeeze the jelly|from your eyes!
{5839}{5900}- Actually, it's quite good on toast.|- Back! Back, beast!
{5902}{5953}Back! I warn ta!
{6023}{6104}- [ GASPING ]|- Right.
{6106}{6172}[ ROARING ]
{6174}{6288}- [ SHOUTING ]|- [ ROARING ]
{6290}{6370}[ ROARING CONTINUES ]
{6372}{6458}[ SHOUTING CONTINUES ]
{6460}{6569}[ WHISPERS ] This is the part|where you run away.
{6571}{6648}- [ GASPING ]|- [ LAUGHS ]
{6650}{6730}[ LAUGHING ]
{6732}{6805}And stay out!
{6850}{6924}Wanted. Fairy tale creatures.
{6963}{7009}[ SIGHS ]
{7054}{7113}[ MAN'S VOICE ]|All right. This one's full.
{7128}{7178}- Take it away!|- [ GASPS ]
{7180}{7273}- Move it along. Come on! Get up!|- Next!
{7275}{7345}Give me that!|Your flying days are over.
{7347}{7410}That's 20 pieces of silver|for the witch. Next!
{7412}{7477}- Get up! Come on!|- Twenty pieces.
{7479}{7536}- [ THUDDING ]|- Sit down there!
{7538}{7598}- Keep quiet!|- [ CRYING ]
{7600}{7669}This cage is too small.
{7671}{7722}Please don't turn me in.|I'll never be stubborn again.
{7723}{7771}I can change.|Please! Give me another chance!
{7773}{7830}Oh, shut up. Oh! Next!
{7832}{7901}- What have you got?|- This little wooden puppet.
{7903}{8021}I'm not a puppet.|I'm a real boy.
{8023}{8080}Five shillings|for the possessed toy.
{8081}{8135}- Take it away.|- Father, please! Don't let them do this!
{8135}{8180}- Help me!|- Next. What have you got?
{8182}{8245}- Well, I've got a talking donkey.|- [ GRUNTS ]
{8247}{8356}Right. Well, that's good for|ten shillings, if you can prove it.
{8358}{8452}Oh, go ahead, little fella.
{8454}{8500}Well?
{8502}{8567}Oh, oh, he's just...|He's just a little nervous.
{8569}{8664}He's really quite a chatterbox.|Talk, you bone headed dolt...
{8666}{8728}- That's it. I've heard enough. Guards!|- No, no, he talks!
{8730}{8829}He does. I can talk.|I love to talk.
{8831}{8901}I'm the talkingest|damn thing you ever saw.
{8903}{8964}- Get her out of my sight.|- No, no!
{8966}{9072}I swear! Oh! He can talk!
{9074}{9126}[ GASPS ]
{9128}{9185}Hey! I can fly!
{9187}{9226}- He can fly!|- He can fly!
{9228}{9301}- He can talk!|- Ha, ha! That's right, fool!
{9303}{9357}Now I'm a flying,|talking donkey.
{9359}{9422}You might have seen a house fly,|maybe even a super fly,
{9424}{9497}but I bet you are not|never seen a donkey fly.
{9499}{9545}Ha, ha!
{9547}{9593}Uh-oh.
{9595}{9648}[ GRUNTS ]
{9650}{9697}Seize him!
{9744}{9812}After him! He's getting away!
{9940}{9998}[ GRUNTS, GASPS ]
{10000}{10077}[ MAN ] Get him! This way! Turn!
{10202}{10257}You there. Ogre!
{10259}{10314}Aye?
{10316}{10414}By the order of Lord Farquaad, I am|authorised to place you both under arrest...
{10416}{10550}and transport you to|a designated... resettlement facility.
{10552}{10649}Oh, really? You and what army?
{10731}{10769}[ GASPS, WHIMPERING ]
{10771}{10817}[ CHUCKLES ]
{10907}{10955}Can I say something to you?
{10957}{11037}Listen, you was really, really something|back there. Incredible!
{11039}{11177}Are you talking to... me? Whoa!
{11179}{11274}Yes, I was talking to you. Can I tell you|that you was great back there? Those guards!
{11276}{11341}They thought they was all of that.|Then you showed up, and bam!
{11343}{11397}They was tripping over themselves|like babes in the woods.
{11398}{11438}That really made me|feel good to see that.
{11440}{11513}- Oh, that's great. Really.|- Man, it's good to be free.
{11515}{11648}Now, why don't you go celebrate your|freedom with your own friends? Hmm?
{11650}{11729}But, uh, I don't|have any friends.
{11731}{11795}And I'm not going|out there by myself.
{11797}{11858}Hey, wait a minute! I got|a great idea! I'll stick with you.
{11860}{11906}You're a mean,|green, fighting machine.
{11908}{11965}Together we'll scare|the spit out of anybody that crosses us.
{11996}{12064}[ ROARING ]
{12066}{12130}Oh, wow! That was really scary.
{12132}{12221}If you don't mind me saying, if that don't work,|your breath certainly will get the job done,
{12222}{12299}'cause you definitely need some Tic Tacs|or something, 'cause your breath stinks!
{12300}{12377}You almost burned the hair|outta my nose,
{12379}{12447}just like the time... [ MUMBLING ]
{12449}{12538}Then I ate some rotten berries. I had|strong gases eking out of my butt that day.
{12540}{12605}Why are you following me?
{12632}{12693}I'll tell you why.
{12695}{12765}♪ 'Cause I'm all alone ♪
{12767}{12857}♪ There's no one here ♪|♪ beside me ♪
{12859}{12947}♪ My problems ♪|♪ have all gone ♪
{12949}{13029}♪ There's no one ♪|♪ to deride me ♪
{13031}{13078}♪ But you gotta have friends... ♪
{13080}{13153}Stop singing!
{13155}{13204}It's no wonder|you don't have any friends.
{13206}{13293}Wow. Only a true friend|would be that truly honest.
{13295}{13393}Listen, little donkey.|Take a look at me. What am I?
{13418}{13465}Uh...
{13510}{13588}- Really tall?|- No! I'm an ogre.
{13590}{13667}You know.|Grab your torch and pitchforks.
{13669}{13717}Doesn't that bother you?
{13719}{13770}Nope.
{13772}{13841}- Really?|- Really, really.
{13843}{13918}- Oh.|- Man, I like you. What's your name?
{13920}{14008}Uh, Shrek.
{14010}{14088}Shrek? Well, you know|what I like about you, Shrek?
{14090}{14187}You got that kind of I-don't-care-what-nobody-|thinks-of-me thing.
{14189}{14280}I like that.|I respect that, Shrek. You all right.
{14282}{14378}Whoo! Look at that. Who'd want|to live in a place like that?
{14380}{14457}That would be my home.
{14459}{14528}Oh! And it is lovely!|Just beautiful.
{14530}{14621}You are quite a decorator. It's amazing|what you've done with such a modest budget.
{14623}{14737}I like that boulder.|That is a nice boulder.
{14827}{14892}I guess you don't|entertain much, do you?
{14894}{14937}I like my privacy.
{14939}{15001}You know, I do too.|That's another thing we have in common.
{15003}{15057}Like, I hate it when|you got somebody in your face.
{15059}{15153}You're trying to give them a hint, and they|won't leave. There's that awkward silence.
{15228}{15293}- Can I stay with you?|- Uh, what?
{15295}{15357}Can I stay with you, please?
{15359}{15414}- Of course!|- Really?
{15416}{15473}- No.|- Please! I don't wanna go back there!
{15475}{15569}You don't know what it's like to be|considered a freak. Well, maybe you do.
{15571}{15633}But that's why we gotta stick together.|You gotta let me stay!
{15635}{15710}- Please! Please!|- Okay! Okay!
{15712}{15774}- But one night only.|- Ah! Thank you!
{15776}{15832}- What are you... No! No!|- This is gonna be fun!
{15834}{15880}We can stay up late,|swapping manly stories,
{15882}{15949}and in the morning|I'm making waffles.
{15951}{16029}- Oh!|- Where do, uh, I sleep?
{16031}{16073}Outside!
{16075}{16149}Oh, well, I guess that's cool.
{16151}{16201}I mean, I don't know you,|and you don't know me,
{16203}{16260}so I guess outside|is best, you know.
{16262}{16334}[ SNIFFLES ] Here I go.
{16386}{16484}Good night. [ SIGHS ]
{16486}{16582}I mean, I do like the outdoors.|I'm a donkey. I was born outside.
{16584}{16648}I'll just be sitting by myself|outside, I guess, you know.
{16650}{16705}By myself, outside.
{16707}{16822}♪ I'm all alone ♪|♪ There's no one here beside me ♪
{16824}{16856}[ BUBBLING ]
{17283}{17341}[ SIGHS ]
{18313}{18361}[ CREAKING ]
{18363}{18426}[ SIGHS ]|I thought I told you to stay outside.
{18428}{18516}- I am outside.|- [ CLATTERING ]
{18518}{18560}[ CLATTERING ]
{18648}{18739}Well, gents, it's a far cry from|the farm, but what choice do we have?
{18741}{18801}It's not home,|but it'll do just fine.
{18803}{18849}What a lovely bed.
{18851}{18907}- Got ta.|- [ SNIFFS ] I found some cheese.
{18909}{18969}- Ow! [ GRUNTS ]|- Blah! Awful stuff.
{19011}{19073}- Is that you, Gorder?|- How did you know?
{19075}{19145}Enough!|What are you doing in my house?
{19147}{19193}[ GRUNTS ] Hey!
{19195}{19258}- [ SNICKERS ]|- Oh, no, no, no.
{19260}{19346}- Dead broad off the table.|- Where are we supposed to put her? The bed's taken.
{19348}{19424}Huh? [ GASPS ]
{19426}{19489}[ MALE VOICE ] What?
{19491}{19605}I live in a swamp. I put up signs.|I'm a terrifying ogre!
{19607}{19670}What do I have to do|to get a little privacy?
{19672}{19730}- Aah!|- Oh, no.
{19732}{19797}Oh, no.
{19799}{19885}- No! No!|- [ CACKLING ]
{19887}{19957}- [ CACKLING CONTINUES ]|- What?
{19959}{20005}- Quit it.|- Don't push.
{20007}{20109}- [ SQUEAKING ]|- [ LOWS ]
{20111}{20181}What are you doing in my swamp?
{20183}{20241}[ ECHOING ] Swamp! Swamp! Swamp!
{20243}{20320}- [ GASPING ]|- Oh, dear!
{20322}{20361}Whoa!
{20363}{20444}All right, get out of here.|All of you, move it!
{20446}{20504}Come on! Let's go!|Hapaya! Hapaya! Hey!
{20506}{20553}- Quickly. Come on!|- No, no!
{20555}{20608}No, no. Not there. Not there.
{20610}{20694}- Oh!|- [ SIGHS ]
{20696}{20765}Hey, don't look at me.|I didn't invite them.
{20767}{20817}Oh, gosh, no one invited us.
{20819}{20881}- What?|- We were forced to come here.
{20883}{20934}- By who?|- Lord Farquaad.
{20936}{21050}He huffed und he puffed und he...|signed an eviction notice.
{21052}{21117}[ SIGHS ] All right.
{21119}{21221}Who knows where|this Farquaad guy is?
{21223}{21290}- [ MURMURING ]|- Oh, I do. I know where he is.
{21292}{21381}Does anyone else|know where to find him?
{21416}{21470}- Any one at all?|- Me! Me!
{21472}{21518}- Anyone?|- Oh! Oh, pick me!
{21520}{21578}Oh, I know! I know! Me, me!
{21580}{21655}[ SIGHS ] Okay, fine.
{21657}{21766}Attention,|all fairy tale things.
{21768}{21881}Do not get comfortable.|Your welcome is officially worn out.
{21883}{21972}In fact, I'm gonna see|this guy Farquaad right now...
{21974}{22049}and get you all off my land|and back where you came from!
{22082}{22157}[ CHEERING ]
{22159}{22228}- [ TWITTERING ]|- [ CHEERING CONTINUES ]
{22230}{22301}Oh! You!
{22303}{22349}You're coming with me.
{22351}{22407}All right, that's|what I like to hear, man.
{22409}{22500}Shrek and Donkey, two stalwart friends,|off on a whirlwind big-city adventure.
{22502}{22550}I love it!
{22552}{22628}♪ - On the road again Sing it ♪|♪ with me, Shrek. - Hey. Oh, oh! ♪
{22630}{22677}♪ I can't wait to get ♪|♪ on the road again ♪
{22679}{22725}What did I say about singing?
{22727}{22773}- Can I whistle?|- No.
{22775}{22842}- Can I hum it?|- All right, hum it.
{22844}{22961}♪ [ HUMMING ] ♪
{22994}{23018}[ GRUNTS ]
{23458}{23554}[ WHIMPERING ]
{23556}{23629}That's enough.|He's ready to talk.
{23631}{23718}[ COUGHING ]
{23720}{23814}[ LAUGHING ]
{23854}{23900}[ CLEARS THROAT ]
{23939}{23998}Run, run, run,|as fast as you can.
{24000}{24085}You can't catch me.|I'm the gingerbread man!
{24087}{24173}- You're a monster.|- I'm not the monster here. You are.
{24175}{24277}You and the rest of that fairy tale|trash, poisoning my perfect world.
{24279}{24325}Now, tell me!|Where are the others?
{24327}{24388}- Eat me!|- [ GRUNTS ]
{24390}{24460}I've tried to be fair|to you creatures.
{24462}{24546}Now my patience has reached its end!|Tell me or I'll...
{24548}{24615}No, no, not the buttons.|Not my gumdrop buttons.
{24617}{24665}All right then.|Who's hiding them?
{24667}{24795}Okay, I'll tell you.|Do you know the muffin man?
{24797}{24853}- The muffin man?|- The muffin man.
{24855}{24937}Yes, I know the muffin man,|who lives on Drury Lane?
{24939}{25021}Well, she's married|to the muffin man.
{25023}{25074}- The muffin man?|- The muffin man!
{25076}{25148}- She's married to the muffin man.|- [ DOOR OPENS ]
{25150}{25190}My Lord! We found it.
{25192}{25269}Then what are you waiting for?|Bring it in.
{25271}{25326}[ MAN GRUNTING ]
{25542}{25602}- [ GASPING ]|- Oh!
{25604}{25708}- Magic mirror...|- Don't tell him anything!
{25710}{25766}No!
{25768}{25858}- [ GINGERBREAD MAN WHIMPERS ]|- Evening.
{25860}{25905}Mirror, mirror, on the wall.
{25907}{25988}Is this not the most|perfect kingdom of them all?
{25990}{26052}Well, technically|you're not a king.
{26054}{26136}Uh, Thelonius.
{26138}{26225}- You were saying?|- What I mean is, you're not a king yet.
{26227}{26313}But you can become one. All|you have to do is marry a princess.
{26315}{26387}- Go on.|- [ CHUCKLES ]
{26389}{26476}So, just sit back|and relax, my Lord,
{26478}{26581}because it's time for you to|meet today's eligible bachelorettes.
{26583}{26669}And here they are!
{26671}{26790}Bachelorette number one is a mentally|abused shut-in from a kingdom far, faraway.
{26792}{26846}She likes sushi|and hot tubbing anytime.
{26848}{26931}Her hobbies include cooking|and cleaning for her two evil sisters.
{26933}{26990}Please welcome Cinderella.
{26992}{27089}Bachelorette number two is a cape-wearing|girl from the land of fancy.
{27091}{27156}Although she lives with|seven other men, she's not easy.
{27158}{27241}Just kiss her dead, frozen lips|and find out what a live wire she is.
{27243}{27333}Come on.|Give it up for Snow White!
{27335}{27398}And last,|but certainly not least,
{27400}{27450}bachelorette number three|is a fiery redhead...
{27452}{27513}from a dragon-guarded castle|surrounded by hot boiling lava!
{27515}{27564}But don't let that cool you off.
{27566}{27642}She's a loaded pistol who likes pina|coladas and getting caught in the rain.
{27644}{27741}Yours for the rescuing,|Princess Fiona!
{27743}{27802}So will it be|bachelorette number one,
{27804}{27888}bachelorette number two|or bachelorette number three?
{27890}{27942}- Two! Two!|- Three! Three!
{27944}{27976}- Two! Two!|- Three!
{27978}{28029}Three? One? [ SHUDDERS ] Three?
{28031}{28080}Three!|Pick number three, my Lord!
{28082}{28172}Okay, okay, uh, number three!
{28174}{28288}Lord Farquaad,|you've chosen Princess Fiona.
{28290}{28381}♪ If you love pina coladas ♪
{28383}{28463}♪ - And getting caught in the rain ♪|♪ - Princess Fiona. ♪
{28465}{28517}♪ - If you're not into yoga ♪|♪ - She's perfect. ♪
{28519}{28585}All I have to do is|just find someone who can go...
{28587}{28652}But I probably should mention|the little thing that happens at night.
{28654}{28700}- I'll do it.|- Yes, but after sunset...
{28702}{28789}Silence! I will make|this Princess Fiona my queen,
{28791}{28891}and DuLoc will finally|have the perfect king!
{28893}{28946}Captain, assemble|your finest men.
{28948}{29041}We're going to have|a tournament.
{29081}{29153}But that's it. That's it|right there. That's DuLoc.
{29155}{29204}I told ta I'd find it.
{29206}{29305}So, that must be|Lord Farquaad's castle.
{29307}{29357}[ DONKEY ]|Uh-huh. That's the place.
{29359}{29441}Do you think maybe|he's compensating for something?
{29443}{29493}[ LAUGHS ]
{29495}{29541}[ GROANS ]
{29543}{29590}Hey, wait. Wait up, Shrek.
{29592}{29661}Hurry, darling.|We're late. Hurry.
{29699}{29784}- Hey, you!|- [ SCREAMS ]
{29786}{29854}Wait a second.|Look, I'm not gonna eat ta.
{29856}{29950}- I just... I just...|- [ WHIMPERING ]
{29952}{30002}[ SIGHS ]
{30039}{30104}[ WHIMPERING, GROANS ]
{30290}{30336}[ TURNSTILE CLATTERS ]
{30371}{30420}[ CHUCKLES ]
{30422}{30482}[ SIGHS ]
{30484}{30577}♪ [ INSTRUMENTAL MUZAK ] ♪
{30682}{30720}It's quiet.
{30778}{30833}Too quiet.
{30835}{30893}[ CREAKING ]
{30895}{30994}- Where is everybody?|- Hey, look at this!
{31059}{31140}[ CLATTERING, WHIRRING, CLICKING ]
{31142}{31225}[ CLICKING ]
{31227}{31313}[ CLICKING QUICKENS ]
{31315}{31397}♪ Welcome to DuLoc ♪|♪ such a perfect town ♪
{31399}{31481}♪ Here we have some rules ♪|♪ Let us lay them down ♪
{31483}{31576}♪ Don't make waves, stay in line ♪|♪ and we'll get along fine ♪
{31578}{31665}♪ DuLoc is a perfect place ♪
{31667}{31776}♪ Please keep off of the grass ♪|♪ Shine your shoes, wipe your... face ♪
{31778}{31864}♪ DuLoc is, DuLoc is ♪
{31866}{31949}♪ DuLoc is a perfect ♪
{31951}{32033}♪ - Place ♪|♪ - [ CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS ] ♪
{32035}{32097}[ WHIRRING ]
{32123}{32224}Wow! Let's do that again!
{32226}{32290}No. No. No, no, no! No.
{32292}{32346}♪ [ TRUMPET FANFARE ] ♪
{32348}{32405}- [ CROWD CHEERING ]|- [ FARQUAAD ] Brave knights.
{32407}{32506}♪ - You are the best and brightest in ♪|♪ all the land. - [ DONKEY HUMMING ] ♪
{32508}{32566}Today one of you|shall prove himself...
{32568}{32624}All right. You're going the right way|for a smacked bottom.
{32626}{32672}- Sorry about that.|- [ CHEERING ]
{32674}{32806}That champion shall have the honour...|No, no... the privilege...
{32808}{32905}to go forth and rescue|the lovely Princess Fiona...
{32907}{32987}from the fiery keep|oft he dragon.
{32989}{33090}If for any reason|the winner is unsuccessful,
{33092}{33168}the first runner-up|will take his place...
{33170}{33237}and so on and so forth.
{33239}{33369}Some of you may die, but it's|a sacrifice I am willing to make.
{33371}{33438}[ CHEERING ]
{33492}{33550}Let the tournament begin!
{33639}{33685}- [ GASPS ]|- Oh!
{33687}{33765}- What is that?|- [ GASPING ]
{33767}{33877}- It's hideous!|- Ah, that's not very nice.
{33879}{33937}- It's just a donkey.|- Huh?
{33939}{34010}Indeed. Knights, new plan!
{34012}{34125}The one who kills the ogre will be|named champion! Have at him!
{34127}{34221}- Get him!|- Oh, hey! Now come on! Hang on now.
{34223}{34278}[ WOMAN ] Go ahead! Get him!
{34280}{34368}Can't we just settle this|over a pint?
{34370}{34400}[ MAN ] Kill the beast!
{34402}{34509}No? All right then.
{34511}{34561}Come on!
{34748}{34854}♪ I don't give a damn ♪|♪ about my reputation ♪
{34856}{34952}♪ - You're living in the past ♪|♪ It's a new generation - Damn! ♪
{34954}{35021}♪ - [ WHINNYING ] - A girl can ♪|♪ do what she wants to do ♪
{35023}{35077}♪ And that's what ♪|♪ I'm gonna do ♪
{35079}{35173}♪ And I don't give a damn ♪|♪ about my bad reputation ♪
{35175}{35265}♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪|♪ Not me ♪
{35267}{35348}♪ - Me, me, me ♪|♪ - Hey, Shrek, tag me! Tag me! ♪
{35350}{35416}♪ And I don't give a damn ♪|♪ about my reputation ♪
{35418}{35472}♪ Never said I wanted ♪|♪ to improve my station ♪
{35474}{35534}Ah! [ LAUGHS ]
{35536}{35597}♪  And I'm always feeling good ♪|♪ when I'm having fun Yeah! ♪
{35598}{35637}♪ And I don't have ♪|♪ to please no one ♪
{35639}{35685}The chair! Give him the chair!
{35687}{35750}♪ And I don't give a damn ♪|♪ about my bad reputation ♪
{35752}{35828}♪ Oh, no, no, no, no, no ♪|♪ Not me ♪
{35830}{35864}♪ Me, me, me ♪
{35866}{35930}♪ Oh, no, no, no, no ♪
{35932}{36020}♪ Not me, not me ♪
{36022}{36081}♪ - Not me ♪|♪ - [ BELL DINGS ] ♪
{36083}{36154}- [ CHEERING ]|- [ LAUGHS ]
{36156}{36281}Oh, yeah! Ah! Ah!
{36283}{36350}Thank you! Thank you very much!
{36352}{36409}I'm here till Thursday.|Try the veal! Ha, ha!
{36411}{36518}- [ SHREK LAUGHS ]|- [ CROWD GASPING, MURMURING ]
{36564}{36611}Shall I give the order, sir?
{36613}{36699}No, I have a better idea.
{36701}{36825}People of DuLoc,|I give you our champion!
{36827}{36920}- What?|- Congratulations, ogre.
{36922}{37026}You've won the honour of|embarking on a great and noble quest.
{37028}{37133}Quest? I'm already on a quest,|a quest to get my swamp back.
{37135}{37212}- Your swamp?|- Yeah, my swamp!
{37214}{37273}Where you dumped|those fairy tale creatures!
{37275}{37337}- [ CROWD MURMURING ]|- Indeed.
{37339}{37389}All right, ogre,|I'll make you a deal.
{37391}{37482}Go on this quest for me, and|I'll give you your swamp back.
{37484}{37549}Exactly the way it was?
{37551}{37617}Down to the last|slime-covered toad stool.
{37619}{37697}- And the squatters?|- As good as gone.
{37770}{37865}What kind of quest?
{37873}{37930}[ DONKEY ] Let me get this straight.|You're gonna go fight a dragon...
{37931}{37995}and rescue a princess just so Farquaad|will give you back a swamp...
{37996}{38073}which you only don't have because he filled|it full of freaks in the first place.
{38073}{38177}- Is that about right?|- Maybe there's a good reason donkeys shouldn't talk.
{38179}{38264}I don't get it. Why don't you just|pull some of that ogre stuff on him?
{38266}{38312}Throttle him,|lay siege to his fortress,
{38314}{38382}grind his bones to make your bread,|the whole ogre trip.
{38384}{38430}Oh, I know what.
{38432}{38485}Maybe I could have|decapitated an entire village...
{38487}{38538}and put their heads on a pike,
{38540}{38627}gotten a knife, cut open their|spleen and drink their fluids.
{38629}{38680}Does that sound good to you?
{38682}{38745}Uh, no, not really, no.
{38747}{38838}For your information, there's a lot|more to ogres than people think.
{38840}{38906}- Example?|- Example?
{38908}{39055}- Okay, um, ogres are like onions.|- [ SNIFFS ] They stink?
{39057}{39112}- Yes... No!|- They make you cry? - No!
{39114}{39196}You leave them out in the sun, they get all|brown, start sprouting little white hairs.
{39198}{39246}No! Layers!
{39248}{39304}Onions have layers.
{39306}{39385}Ogres have layers!|Onions have layers.
{39387}{39445}You get it? We both have layers.|[ SIGHS ]
{39491}{39577}Oh, you both have layers. Oh.
{39579}{39660}[ SNIFFS ]|You know, not everybody likes onions.
{39662}{39725}Cake! Everybody loves cakes!|Cakes have layers.
{39727}{39821}I don't care...|what everyone likes.
{39823}{39912}Ogres are not like cakes.
{39956}{40037}You know what else|everybody likes? Parfaits.
{40039}{40096}Have you ever met a person, you|say, Let's get some parfait,
{40096}{40133}they say, No,|I don't like no parfait?
{40135}{40201}- Parfaits are delicious.|- No!
{40203}{40269}You dense, irritating,|miniature beast of burden!
{40271}{40341}Ogres are like onions!|End of story.
{40343}{40390}Bye-bye. See ta later.
{40482}{40588}Parfaits may be the most delicious thing|on the whole damn planet.
{40590}{40643}You know, I think|I preferred your humming.
{40645}{40709}Do you have a tissue or something?|I'm making a mess.
{40711}{40781}Just the word parfait|make me start slobbering.
{40887}{41028}♪ I'm on my way from misery ♪|♪ to happiness today ♪
{41030}{41090}♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪|♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪
{41092}{41223}♪ I'm on my way from misery ♪|♪ to happiness today ♪
{41225}{41284}♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪|♪ Uh-huh, uh-huh ♪
{41286}{41380}♪ And everything ♪|♪ that you receive up yonder ♪
{41382}{41476}♪ Is what you give to me ♪|♪ the day I wander ♪
{41478}{41549}♪ I'm on my way ♪
{41575}{41645}♪ I'm on my way ♪
{41671}{41721}♪ I'm on my way ♪
{41723}{41782}Ooh! Shrek! Did you do that?
{41784}{41875}You gotta warn somebody before you|just crack one off. My mouth was open.
{41877}{41966}Believe me, Donkey, if|it was me, you'd be dead.
{41968}{42034}[ SNIFFS ] It's brimstone.
{42036}{42112}- We must be getting close.|- Yeah, right, brimstone.
{42114}{42212}Don't be talking about it's the brimstone. I|know what I smell. It wasn't no brimstone.
{42214}{42261}It didn't come off|no stone neither.
{42331}{42384}[ RUMBLING ]
{42693}{42773}Sure, it's big enough,|but look at the location.
{42775}{42846}[ LAUGHING ]
{42848}{42961}Uh, Shrek? Uh, remember when|you said ogres have layers?
{42963}{43009}Oh, aye.
{43011}{43097}Well, I have a bit|of a confession to make.
{43099}{43180}Donkeys don't have layers. We wear|our fear right out there on our sleeves.
{43182}{43280}- Wait a second. Donkeys don't have sleeves.|- You know what I mean.
{43282}{43346}You can't tell me|you're afraid of heights.
{43348}{43458}I'm just a little uncomfortable about being on|a rickety bridge over a boiling lake of lava!
{43460}{43557}Come on, Donkey.|I'm right here beside ta, okay?
{43559}{43623}For emotional support,
{43625}{43734}we'll just tackle this thing|together one little baby step at a time.
{43736}{43782}- Really?|- Really, really.
{43784}{43861}- Okay, that makes me feel so much better.|- Just keep moving.
{43863}{43973}- And don't look down.|- Okay, don't look down. Don't look down.
{43975}{44056}Don't look down.|Keep on moving. Don't look down.
{44058}{44149}[ GASPS ] Shrek! I'm looking down!
{44151}{44221}Oh, God, I can't do this!|Just let me off, please!
{44223}{44308}- But you're already halfway.|- But I know that half is safe!
{44310}{44377}Okay, fine. I don't|have time for this. You go back.
{44379}{44437}- Shrek, no! Wait!|- Just, Donkey...
{44439}{44513}- Let's have a dance then, shall we?|- Don't do that!
{44515}{44608}Oh, I'm sorry. Do what?
{44610}{44684}- Oh, this?|- Yes, that!
{44686}{44768}Yes? Yes, do it. Okay.
{44770}{44825}[ SCREAMS ] No, Shrek!
{44827}{44902}- No! Stop it!|- You said do it! I'm doing it.
{44904}{45006}I'm gonna die. I'm gonna die.|Shrek, I'm gonna die.
{45008}{45068}Oh!
{45070}{45166}That'll do, Donkey. That'll do.
{45247}{45301}Cool.
{45303}{45369}[ DONKEY ] So where is this|fire-breathing pain-in-the-neck anyway?
{45371}{45461}Inside, waiting for us|to rescue her.
{45463}{45533}[ CHUCKLES ]|I was talking about the dragon, Shrek.
{45568}{45613}[ WATER DRIPPING ]
{45653}{45699}[ WIND HOWLING ]
{45904}{45950}[ DONKEY WHISPERING ] You afraid?
{45952}{46031}No, but... Shh.
{46033}{46118}Oh, good. Me neither. [ GASPS ]
{46120}{46201}'Cause there's nothing|wrong with being afraid.
{46203}{46281}Fear's a sensible response|to an unfamiliar situation.
{46283}{46332}Unfamiliar dangerous|situation, I might add.
{46334}{46398}With a dragon that breathes fire|and eats knights and breathes fire,
{46399}{46482}it sure doesn't mean you're a coward|if you're a little scared.
{46484}{46580}I sure as heck am not a coward.|I know that. [ GASPS ]
{46582}{46662}Donkey, two things, okay?
{46664}{46725}Shut... up.
{46727}{46793}Now go over there and see|if you can find any stairs.
{46795}{46858}Stairs? I thought|we was looking for the princess.
{46860}{46977}The princess will be up the stairs in|the highest room in the tallest tower.
{46979}{47065}- What makes you think she'll be there?|- I read it in a book once.
{47067}{47161}Cool. You handle the dragon.|I'll handle the stairs.
{47163}{47236}I'll find those stairs.|I'll whip their butt too.
{47238}{47285}Those stairs won't know|which way they're going.
{47287}{47345}[ CREAKING ]
{47393}{47440}I'm gonna take drastic steps.
{47442}{47509}Kick it to the kerb. Don't mess|with me. I'm the stair master.
{47511}{47621}I've mastered the stairs. I wish I had a|step right here. I'd step all over it.
{47692}{47777}Well, at least we know|where the princess is, but where's the...
{47779}{47881}Dragon! [ SCREAMS ]
{47907}{47953}[ GASPS ]
{48082}{48122}[ ROARS ]
{48207}{48261}Donkey, look out! [ SCREAMS ]
{48290}{48385}[ SCREAMS ]
{48444}{48485}[ WHIMPERING ]
{48540}{48588}- Got ta!|- [ ROARS ]
{48590}{48664}[ GASPS ]
{48666}{48792}[ SHOUTS ] Whoa! Whoa! Whoa!
{48794}{48865}[ SCREAMING ]
{49062}{49125}[ GASPS ]
{49127}{49238}Oh! Aah! Aah!
{49240}{49324}[ GASPING ]
{49353}{49444}[ GROWLS ]
{49446}{49528}No. Oh, no. No! [ SCREAMS ]
{49530}{49617}- Oh, what large teeth you have.|- [ GROWLS ]
{49619}{49711}I mean, white, sparkling teeth. I know you|probably hear this all the time from your food,
{49713}{49812}but you must bleach, 'cause that|is one dazzling smile you got there.
{49814}{49874}Do I detect a hint|of minty freshness?
{49876}{49990}And you know what else?|You're... You're a girl dragon!
{49992}{50100}Oh, sure! I mean,|of course you're a girl dragon.
{50102}{50193}You're just reeking|of feminine beauty.
{50195}{50251}What's the matter with you?|You got something in your eye?
{50253}{50321}Ooh. Oh. Oh.
{50322}{50384}Man, I'd really love to stay,|but, you know, I'm, uh... [ COUGHS ]
{50385}{50478}I'm an asthmatic, and I don't know if it'd|work out if you're gonna blow smoke rings.
{50480}{50526}Shrek! [ GASPS ]
{50528}{50617}[ WHIMPERING ] No! Shrek! Shrek!
{50619}{50665}Shrek!
{50680}{50758}[ Groans, Sighs ]
{50760}{50837}♪ [ CHORUS VOCALISING ] ♪
{50944}{51045}♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪
{51352}{51413}♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪
{51415}{51449}Oh! Oh!
{51451}{51497}- Wake up!|- What?
{51499}{51538}Are you Princess Fiona?
{51540}{51668}I am, awaiting a knight|so bold as to rescue me.
{51670}{51718}Oh, that's nice. Now let's go!
{51720}{51768}But wait, Sir Knight.
{51770}{51825}This be-ith our first meeting.
{51827}{51916}Should it not be|a wonderful, romantic moment?
{51918}{52022}- Yeah, sorry, lady. There's no time.|- Hey, wait. What are you doing?
{52024}{52074}You should sweep me|off my feet...
{52076}{52157}out yonder window and down a rope|on to your valiant steed.
{52159}{52226}You've had a lot of time|to plan this, haven't you?
{52228}{52330}Mm-hmm. [ SCREAMS, GRUNTS ]
{52332}{52401}But we have to|savour this moment!
{52403}{52469}You could recite|an epic poem for me.
{52471}{52530}A ballad? A sonnet!
{52532}{52610}- A Limerick? Or something!|- I don't think so.
{52612}{52718}Can I at least know|the name of my champion?
{52720}{52766}Um, Shrek.
{52768}{52857}Sir Shrek. [ CLEARS THROAT ]
{52859}{52973}I pray that you take this favour|as a token of my gratitude.
{53000}{53048}Thanks!
{53090}{53142}[ ROARING ]
{53144}{53188}You didn't slay the dragon?
{53190}{53249}- It's on my to-do list. Now come on!|- [ SCREAMS ]
{53251}{53313}But this isn't right!
{53315}{53369}You were meant to charge in,|sword drawn, banner flying.
{53371}{53421}That's what all|the other knights did.
{53423}{53478}Yeah, right before|they burst into flame.
{53480}{53565}That's not the point. Oh!
{53567}{53626}Wait. Where are you going?|The exit's over there.
{53628}{53677}Well, I have to save my ass.
{53679}{53756}What kind of knight are you?
{53758}{53816}One of a kind.
{53818}{53875}[ DONKEY ]|Slowdown. Slowdown, baby, please.
{53877}{53978}I believe it's healthy to get to|know someone over a long period of time.
{53980}{54042}Just call me old-fashioned.|[ LAUGHS ]
{54044}{54128}I don't want to rush into|a physical relationship.
{54130}{54213}I'm not emotionally ready|for a commitment of, uh, this...
{54215}{54270}Magnitude really is|the word I'm looking for.
{54272}{54356}Magnitude... Hey, that is|unwanted physical contact.
{54358}{54417}Hey, what are you doing?
{54419}{54497}Okay, okay. Let's just backup a little|and take this one step a ta time.
{54499}{54598}We really should get to know each other|first as friends or pen pals.
{54600}{54701}I'm on the road a lot,|but I just love receiving cards...
{54703}{54761}I'd really love to stay, but...
{54763}{54825}Don't do that! That's my tail!|That's my personal tail.
{54827}{54909}You're gonna tear it off. I don't give|permission... What are you gonna do with that?
{54911}{55002}Hey, now. No way. No! No!
{55004}{55070}No, no! No. No, no, no! No! Oh!
{55187}{55234}[ GROWLS ]
{55303}{55349}[ ROARS ]
{55678}{55712}- [ ROARING ]|- [ GASPS ]
{55714}{55761}- Hi, Princess!|- It talks!
{55763}{55853}Yeah, it's getting him|to shut up that's the trick.
{55855}{55885}[ SCREAMS ]
{55922}{55977}[ SCREAMING ]
{55979}{56018}Oh!
{56020}{56053}- [ THUDS ]|- [ GROANS ]
{56055}{56137}[ SHREK GROANS ]
{56139}{56214}[ ROARS ]
{56262}{56308}[ ROARS ]
{56343}{56413}[ ROARING ]
{56451}{56512}[ ROARS ]
{56706}{56752}Okay, you two,|head for the exit!
{56779}{56840}I'll take care of the dragon.
{56998}{57128}[ ECHOING ] Run!
{57359}{57447}[ GASPING ]
{57449}{57501}[ SCREAMING ]
{57503}{57580}[ ROARING ]
{57627}{57697}- [ SCREAMS ]|- [ ROARS ]
{57791}{57881}[ PANTING, SIGHS ]
{57883}{57929}[ WHIMPERS ]
{57931}{57993}[ ROARS ]
{58034}{58114}[ ROARS, WHIMPERS ]
{58125}{58237}- [ DRAGON GROWLING IN THE DISTANCE ]|- You did it!
{58239}{58308}You rescued me!|You're amazing. You're...
{58310}{58400}You're wonderful. You're...
{58402}{58457}a little unorthodox I'll admit.
{58459}{58577}But thy deed is great,|and thine heart is pure.
{58579}{58670}- I am eternally in your debt.|- [ CLEARS THROAT ]
{58672}{58776}And where would a brave knight be|without his noble steed?
{58778}{58890}I hope you heard that. She called me|a noble steed. She think I'm a steed.
{58892}{58968}[ FIONA LAUGHS ]|The battle is won.
{58970}{59030}You may remove your helmet,|good Sir Knight.
{59032}{59094}- Uh, no.|- Why not?
{59096}{59149}I have helmet hair.
{59151}{59228}Please. I would'st look|upon the face of my rescuer.
{59230}{59292}No, no, you wouldn't... 'St.
{59294}{59353}But how will you kiss me?
{59355}{59445}What? That wasn't|in the job description.
{59447}{59504}Maybe it's a perk.
{59506}{59612}No, it's destiny.|Oh, you must know how it goes.
{59614}{59705}A princess locked in a tower|and beset by a dragon...
{59707}{59777}is rescued by a brave knight,
{59779}{59858}and then they share|true love's first kiss.
{59860}{59910}Hmm? With Shrek?|You think... Wait.
{59912}{59988}Wait. You think that|Shrek is your true love?
{59990}{60038}Well, yes.
{60079}{60133}- [ LAUGHING ]|- [ LAUGHING ]
{60135}{60194}You think Shrek|is your true love!
{60196}{60242}What is so funny?
{60244}{60318}Let's just say I'm|not your type, okay?
{60320}{60404}Of course, you are.|You're my rescuer.
{60406}{60465}Now... Now remove your helmet.
{60467}{60520}Look. I really don't think|this is a good idea.
{60522}{60570}- Just take off the helmet.|- I'm not going to.
{60572}{60600}- Take it off.|- No!
{60602}{60652}- Now!|- Okay!
{60654}{60762}Easy. As you command,|Your Highness.
{61003}{61085}You... You're a... an ogre.
{61087}{61181}Oh, you were expecting|Prince Charming.
{61183}{61243}Well, yes, actually.
{61289}{61367}Oh, no. This is all wrong.
{61369}{61424}You're not supposed|to be an ogre.
{61426}{61552}[ SIGHS ] Princess, I was sent|to rescue you by Lord Farquaad, okay?
{61554}{61600}He's the one|who wants to marry you.
{61602}{61648}Then why didn't|he come rescue me?
{61650}{61754}Good question. You should|ask him that when we get there.
{61756}{61829}But I have to be rescued|by my true love,
{61831}{61897}not by some ogre|and his... his pet.
{61899}{61948}So much for noble steed.
{61950}{62013}You're not making|my job any easier.
{62015}{62096}I'm sorry, but your job|is not my problem.
{62098}{62224}You can tell Lord Farquaad|that if he wants to rescue me properly,
{62226}{62282}I'll be waiting for him|right here.
{62284}{62405}Hey! I'm no one's messenger boy,|all right? I'm a delivery boy.
{62407}{62461}You wouldn't dare.
{62463}{62511}- Put me down!|- Ya coming, Donkey?
{62513}{62560}I'm right behind ta.
{62562}{62648}Put me down, or you will|suffer the consequences!
{62650}{62758}This is not dignified!|Put me down! [ SCREAMS ]
{62760}{62829}Okay, so here's|another question.
{62831}{62908}Say there's a woman that digs you, right,|but you don't really like her that way.
{62908}{62967}How do you let her down real easy|so her feelings aren't hurt,
{62967}{63025}but you don't get burned|to a crisp and eaten?
{63027}{63093}You just tell her|she's not your true love.
{63095}{63160}Everyone knowest what happens|when you find your...
{63162}{63224}Hey! [ SIGHS ]
{63226}{63281}The sooner we get|to DuLoc the better.
{63283}{63353}You're gonna love it there,|Princess. It's beautiful!
{63355}{63445}And what of my groom-to-be?|Lord Farquaad? What's he like?
{63447}{63498}Let me put it this way,|Princess.
{63500}{63596}Men of Farquaad's stature|are in short supply.
{63598}{63644}[ LAUGHS ]
{63646}{63744}I don't know. There are those who|think little of him.
{63746}{63793}[ BOTH LAUGHING ]
{63795}{63864}Stop it. Stop it, both of you.
{63866}{63985}You're just jealous you can never measure|up to a great ruler like Lord Farquaad.
{63987}{64057}Yeah, well, maybe|you're right, Princess.
{64059}{64138}But I'll let you do the measuring|when you see him tomorrow.
{64140}{64241}Tomorrow? It'll take that lon?
{64243}{64356}- Shouldn't we stop to make camp?|- No, that'll take longer.
{64358}{64464}- We can keep going.|- But there's robbers in the woods.
{64466}{64546}Whoa! Time out, Shrek!|Camping is starting to sound good.
{64548}{64646}Hey, come on. I'm scarier than anything|we're going to see in this forest.
{64648}{64705}I need to find|somewhere to camp now!
{64707}{64760}[ BIRD WINGS FLUTTERING ]
{64809}{64868}[ GRUNTING ]
{64870}{64968}- Hey! Over here.|- Shrek, we can do better than that.
{64970}{65032}I don't think|this is fit for a princess.
{65034}{65101}No, no, it's perfect.|It just needs a few homey touches.
{65103}{65221}- Homey touches? Like what?|- [ CRASHING ]
{65223}{65325}A door? Well, gentlemen,|I bid thee good night.
{65327}{65384}You want me to read you|a bedtime story? I will.
{65386}{65442}I said good night!
{65501}{65548}Shrek, what are you doing?
{65550}{65623}[ LAUGHS ]|I just... You know... Oh, come on.
{65625}{65688}I was just kidding.
{65767}{65813}[ FIRE CRACKLING ]
{65815}{65901}And, uh, that one,|that's Throwback,
{65903}{65985}the only ogre to ever spit|over three wheat fields.
{65987}{66061}Right. Yeah.
{66063}{66133}Hey, can you tell my future|from these stars?
{66135}{66221}The stars don't tell the future, Donkey.|They tell stories.
{66223}{66309}Look, there's BITNET,|the Fitment.
{66311}{66398}- You can guess what he's famous for.|- I know you're making this up.
{66400}{66465}No, look. There he is,
{66467}{66541}and there's the group of hunters|running away from his stench.
{66543}{66605}That is nothing but|a bunch of little dots.
{66607}{66701}Sometimes things are|more than they appear.
{66703}{66755}Hmm?
{66757}{66806}Forget it.
{66808}{66872}[ SIGHS ]
{66874}{66964}Hey, Shrek, what we gonna do|when we get our swamp anyway?
{66966}{67009}Our swamp?
{67011}{67061}You know, when we're through|rescuing the princess.
{67063}{67177}We? Donkey, there's no we.|There's no our.
{67179}{67233}There's just me and my swamp.
{67235}{67337}The first thing I'm gonna do is build|a ten-foot wall around my land.
{67339}{67399}You cut me deep, Shrek.
{67401}{67481}You cut me real deep just now.
{67483}{67529}You know what I think?
{67531}{67606}I think this whole wall thing|is just a way to keep somebody out.
{67608}{67708}- No, do ta think?|- Are you hiding something?
{67710}{67757}Never mind, Donkey.
{67759}{67841}Oh, this is another one of|those onion things, isn't it?
{67843}{67929}No, this is one of those drop-it|and leave-it-alone things.
{67931}{68021}- Why don't you want to talk about it?|- Why do you want to?
{68023}{68066}- Why are you blocking?|- I'm not blocking.
{68068}{68122}- Oh, yes, you are.|- Donkey, I'm warning you.
{68124}{68208}- Who you trying to keep out?|- Everyone! Okay?
{68238}{68297}Oh, now we're getting somewhere.
{68299}{68378}Oh! For the love of Pete!
{68380}{68438}What's your problem?|What you got against the whole world?
{68440}{68493}I'm not the one|with the problem, okay?
{68495}{68566}It's the world that seems|to have a problem with me.
{68568}{68661}People take one look at me|and go, Aah! Help! Run!
{68663}{68753}A big, stupid, ugly ogre!
{68755}{68856}[ SIGHS ] They judge me before|they even know me.
{68858}{68904}That's why I'm better off alone.
{69094}{69147}You know what?
{69149}{69285}When we met, I didn't think you was|just a big, stupid, ugly ogre.
{69287}{69357}Yeah, I know.
{69359}{69441}So, uh, are there|any donkeys up there?
{69443}{69524}Well, there's, um, Gabby,
{69526}{69581}the Small and Annoying.
{69583}{69701}Okay, I see it now. The big shiny|one, right there. That one there?
{69703}{69779}- That's the moon.|- Oh, okay.
{70023}{70129}♪ [ ORCHESTRA ] ♪
{70167}{70260}♪ [ DULCIMER ] ♪
{70291}{70349}[ FARQUAAD ] Again. Show me again.
{70351}{70454}[ MUSIC STOPS, REWINDS ]
{70456}{70554}Mirror, mirror, show her to me.|Show me the princess.
{70556}{70653}♪ - Humph. ♪|♪ - [ REWINDS, RESUMES ] ♪
{70655}{70770}Ah. Perfect. [ INHALES ]
{70938}{70984}[ SNORING ]
{71175}{71258}♪ [ VOCALISING ] ♪
{71260}{71337}♪ [ VOCALISING CONTINUES ] ♪
{71339}{71406}♪ [ WHISTLING ] ♪
{71408}{71486}♪ [ WHISTLING CONTINUES ] ♪
{71488}{71561}♪ - [ VOCALISES ] ♪|♪ - [ WHISTLES ] ♪
{71563}{71636}♪ - [ VOCALISES ] ♪|♪ - [ WHISTLES ] ♪
{71638}{71712}♪ - [ VOCALISING ] ♪|♪ - [ WHISTLING ] ♪
{71714}{71796}♪ - [ VOCALISING, HIGH-PITCHED ] ♪|♪ - [ WHISTLING, HIGH-PITCHED ] ♪
{71798}{71852}♪ [ CONTINUES ] ♪
{71908}{71945}[ SIZZLING ]
{72111}{72209}[ SNIFFS, YAWNS ]
{72288}{72357}Mmm, yeah, you know|I like it like that.
{72359}{72461}- Come on, baby. I said I like it.|- Donkey, wake up.
{72463}{72524}- Huh? What?|- Wake up.
{72526}{72573}- What?|- Good morning.
{72575}{72653}How do you like your eggs?
{72655}{72750}- Good morning, Princess!|- What's all this about?
{72752}{72847}We kind of got off|to a bad start yesterday.
{72849}{72897}I wanted to make it up to you.
{72899}{73008}After all, you did rescue me.
{73010}{73082}- Uh, thanks.|- [ SNIFFS ]
{73084}{73175}Well, eat up.|We've got a big day ahead of us.
{73282}{73329}- [ BELCHES ]|- Shrek!
{73331}{73376}What? It's a compliment.
{73378}{73449}Better out than in,|I always say. [ LAUGHS ]
{73451}{73541}Well, it's no way to behave in|front of a princess. - [ BELCHES ]
{73543}{73606}- Thanks.|- She's as nasty as you are.
{73608}{73724}[ LAUGHS ] You know,|you're not exactly what I expected.
{73726}{73848}Maybe you shouldn't judge people|before you get to know them.
{73850}{73913}♪ [ VOCALISING ] ♪
{73915}{73970}[ MAN ] La Liberte! Hey!
{73972}{74018}Princess!
{74020}{74084}- [ LAUGHS ]|- What are you doing?
{74086}{74156}Be still, Mon Cherie,|for I am your saviour!
{74158}{74265}And I am rescuing you from this green...|[ KISSING SOUNDS ]
{74267}{74328}- beast.|- Hey!
{74330}{74386}That's my princess!|Go find your own!
{74388}{74509}Please, monster!|Can't you see I'm a little busy here?
{74511}{74597}Look, pal, I don't know|who you think you are!
{74599}{74661}Oh! Of course! Oh, how rude.
{74663}{74713}Please let me introduce myself.
{74715}{74784}Oh, Merry Men! [ LAUGHS ]
{74786}{74881}♪ [ ACCORDION ] ♪
{74883}{74930}♪ Ta, dah, dah, dah, whoo ♪
{74932}{74982}♪ I steal from the rich ♪|♪ and give to the needy ♪
{74984}{75039}♪ - He takes a wee percentage ♪|♪ - But I'm not greedy ♪
{75039}{75085}♪ I rescue pretty damsels ♪|♪ Man, I'm good ♪
{75087}{75158}♪ - What a guy, Monsieur Hood ♪|♪ - Break it down. ♪
{75247}{75301}♪ I like an honest fight ♪|♪ and a saucy little maid ♪
{75303}{75368}♪ - What he's basically saying ♪|♪ is he likes to get... - Paid ♪
{75369}{75434}♪ - So - When an ogre in the ♪|♪ bush grabs a lady by the tush ♪
{75434}{75478}♪ - That's bad ♪|♪ - That's bad ♪
{75480}{75536}♪ When a beauty's with a beast ♪|♪ it makes me awfully mad ♪
{75537}{75582}♪ He's mad ♪|♪ He's really, really mad ♪
{75584}{75637}♪ I'll take my blade and ♪|♪ ram it through your heart ♪
{75637}{75741}♪ Keep your eyes on me, boys ♪|♪ 'cause I'm about to start ♪
{75743}{75805}[ GRUNTS, GROANS ]
{75807}{75873}- [ KARATE YELL ]|- [ MERRY MEN GASPING ]
{75875}{75938}[ PANTING ]|Man, that was annoying!
{75940}{75982}Oh, you little...
{76223}{76269}[ Karate Yell ]
{76350}{76429}♪ [ ACCORDION ] ♪
{76500}{76568}[ SHOUTING, GROANING ]
{76570}{76633}[ GROANING ]
{76635}{76709}[ CHUCKLES ] Um, shall we?
{76741}{76810}- Ho Id the phone.|- [ GRUNTS ]
{76824}{76895}Oh! Whoa, whoa, whoa.|Hold on now.
{76897}{76945}- Where did that come from?|- What?
{76947}{77016}That! Back there.|That was amazing!
{77018}{77064}Where did you learn that?
{77066}{77141}Well... [ CHUCKLES ]|When one lives alone,
{77143}{77209}uh, one has to learn these things|in case there's a...
{77211}{77274}- There's an arrow in your butt!|- What?
{77276}{77367}- Oh, would you look at that?|- Oh, no. This is all my fault.
{77369}{77415}- I'm so sorry.|- Why? What's wrong?
{77417}{77497}- Shrek's hurt.|- Shrek's hurt. Shrek's hurt? Oh, no, Shrek's gonna die.
{77499}{77590}- Donkey, I'm okay.|- You can't do this to me. I'm too young for you to die.
{77592}{77643}Keep your legs elevated.|Turn your head and cough.
{77645}{77717}- Does anyone know the Heimlich?|- Donkey! Calm down.
{77719}{77830}If you want to help Shrek, run into the woods|and find me a blue flower with red thorns.
{77832}{77918}Blue flower, red thorns. Okay,|I'm on it. Blue flower, red thorns.
{77920}{78003}Don't die, Shrek. If you see|a long tunnel, stay away from the light!
{78005}{78081}- [ BOTH ] Donkey!|- Oh, yeah. Right. Blue flower, red thorns.
{78083}{78138}- Blue flower, red thorns.|- What are the flowers for?
{78140}{78193}- For getting rid of Donkey.|- Ah.
{78195}{78252}Now you hold still,|and I'll yank this thing out.
{78254}{78307}Ow! Hey! Easy with the yanking.
{78309}{78372}- I'm sorry, but it has to come out.|- No, it's tender.
{78374}{78416}Now, hold on.
{78417}{78472}- What you're doing is the opposite of help.|- Don't move.
{78472}{78534}- Look, time out.|- Would you...
{78536}{78643}[ GRUNTS ]|Okay. What do you propose we do?
{78644}{78714}Blue flower, red thorns. Blue flower,|red thorns. Blue flower, red thorns.
{78714}{78769}This would be so much easier|if I wasn't colour-blind!
{78771}{78821}- Blue flower, red thorns.|- [ SHREK ] Ow!
{78823}{78881}Ho Id on, Shrek! I'm coming!
{78917}{78968}Ow! Not good.
{78970}{79031}- Okay. Okay, I can nearly see the head.|- [ GRUNTS ]
{79033}{79096}- It's just about...|- Ow! Ohh!
{79140}{79203}Ahem.
{79205}{79286}Nothing happened.|We were just, uh...
{79288}{79353}Look, if you wanted to be alone,|all you had to do was ask.
{79355}{79433}Oh, come on!|That's the last thing on my mind.
{79435}{79523}The princess here|was just... Ugh!
{79599}{79664}- Ow!|- Hey, what's that?
{79666}{79734}[ NERVOUS CHUCKLE ]|That's... Is that blood?
{79736}{79782}[ SIGHS ]
{79792}{79830}[ BIRD CHIRPING ]
{79935}{79981}[ GRUNTS ]
{80125}{80213}♪ My beloved monster and me ♪
{80243}{80351}♪ We go everywhere together ♪
{80353}{80466}♪ Wearing a raincoat ♪|♪ that has four sleeves ♪
{80468}{80579}♪ - Gets us through all kinds ♪|♪ of weather - Aah! ♪
{80581}{80707}♪ She will always be ♪|♪ the only thing ♪
{80709}{80817}♪ That comes between me ♪|♪ and the awful sting ♪
{80819}{80941}♪ That comes from living in a world ♪|♪ that's so damn mean ♪
{81086}{81161}[ CROAKS ]
{81163}{81262}♪ Oh, oh-oh-oh-oh ♪
{81609}{81656}Hey!
{81658}{81758}♪ - La-la, la-la, la-la-la-la ♪|♪ - [ BOTH LAUGHING ] ♪
{81760}{81857}♪ La-la, la-la, la-la ♪
{81905}{81951}There it is, Princess.
{81953}{82009}Your future awaits you.
{82011}{82065}- That's DuLoc?|- Yeah, I know.
{82067}{82131}You know, Shrek thinks Lord Farquaad's|compensating for something,
{82133}{82193}which I think means|he has a really... Ow!
{82195}{82241}Um, I, uh...
{82243}{82301}- I guess we better move on.|- Sure.
{82303}{82353}But, Shrek?
{82355}{82422}- I'm... I'm worried about Donkey.|- [ BLUBBERING ]
{82424}{82481}- What?|- I mean, look at him.
{82483}{82555}- He doesn't look so good.|- What are you talking about? I'm fine.
{82557}{82677}That's what they always say, and then|next thing you know, you're on your back.
{82679}{82738}- Dead.|- You know, she's right.
{82740}{82809}You look awful.|Do you want to sit down?
{82811}{82876}- I'll make you some tea.|- I didn't want to say nothing,
{82878}{82948}but I got this twinge in my neck,|and when I turn my head like this, look.
{82948}{82992}- [ BONES CRUNCH ]|- Ow! See?
{82994}{83056}- Who's hungry? I'll find us some dinner.|- I'll get the firewood.
{83058}{83166}Hey, where you going?|Oh, man, I can't feel my toes!
{83168}{83228}I don't have any toes!
{83230}{83286}I think I need a hug.
{83371}{83425}Mmm.
{83427}{83522}Mmm. This is good.|This is really good.
{83575}{83629}- What is this?|- Uh, weed rat.
{83631}{83682}Rotisserie style.
{83684}{83744}No kidding.
{83746}{83792}Well, this is delicious.
{83794}{83844}Well, they're also great|in stews.
{83846}{83948}Now, I don't mean to brag,|but I make a mean weed rat stew.
{83950}{84035}[ CHUCKLING ]
{84037}{84136}[ SIGHS ] I guess I'll be dining|a little differently tomorrow night.
{84138}{84260}[ GULPS ] Maybe you can|come visit me in the swamp sometime.
{84262}{84314}I'll cook all kinds|of stuff for you.
{84316}{84409}Swamp toad soup, fish eye tartare...|You name it.
{84411}{84486}[ CHUCKLES ] I'd like that.
{84488}{84569}[ SLURPS, LAUGHS ]
{84652}{84729}♪ See the pyramids ♪|♪ along the Nile ♪
{84731}{84794}Um, Princess?
{84796}{84898}♪ - Watch the sun rise from a ♪|♪ tropic isle - Yes, Shrek? ♪
{84900}{84992}♪ - I, um, I was wondering. - Just ♪|♪ remember, darling all the while ♪
{84994}{85048}Are you...
{85050}{85112}♪ You belong to me ♪
{85114}{85181}[ SIGHS ] Are you gonna eat that?
{85296}{85342}[ CHUCKLES ]
{85344}{85442}- Man, isn't this romantic? Just look at that sunset.|- Sunset?
{85444}{85505}Oh, no! I mean, it's late.
{85507}{85552}- I-It's very late.|- What?
{85554}{85624}Wait a minute.|I see what's going on here.
{85626}{85697}- You're afraid of the dark, aren't you?|- Yes!
{85699}{85795}Yes, that's it. I'm terrified.|You know, I'd better go inside.
{85797}{85877}Don't feel bad, Princess. I used to|be afraid of the dark, too, until...
{85879}{85945}Hey, no, wait.|I'm still afraid of the dark.
{85947}{86023}- [ SHREK SIGHS ]|- Good night.
{86025}{86098}Good night.
{86100}{86173}- [ DOOR CREAKS ]|- [ DONKEY ] Ohh!
{86175}{86241}Now I really see|what's going on here.
{86243}{86289}Oh, what are you talking about?
{86291}{86357}I don't even wanna hear it. Look,|I'm an animal, and I got instincts.
{86359}{86417}I know you two were digging|on each other. I could feel it.
{86419}{86487}You're crazy.|I'm just bringing her back to Farquaad.
{86489}{86569}Oh, come on, Shrek.|Wake up and smell the pheromones.
{86571}{86635}- Just go on in and tell her how you feel.|- I...
{86637}{86733}There's nothing to tell.|Besides, even if I did tell her that,
{86735}{86781}well, you know...
{86783}{86867}And I'm not saying I do|'cause I don't...
{86869}{86927}She's a princess, and I'm...
{86929}{86993}An ogre?
{86995}{87059}Yeah. An ogre.
{87061}{87158}- Hey, where you going?|- To get... more firewood.
{87407}{87457}[ SIGHS ]
{87628}{87660}Princess?
{87662}{87727}Princess Fiona?
{87829}{87897}Princess, where are you?
{87899}{87960}[ WINGS FLUTTERING ]
{88023}{88083}Princess?
{88085}{88155}- [ CREAKING ]|- [ GASPS ]
{88157}{88223}It's very spooky in here.|I am not playing no games.
{88331}{88373}[ SCREAMS ]
{88468}{88526}Aah! Oh, no! No, help!
{88528}{88602}- Shh! - Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!|- No, it's okay. It's okay.
{88604}{88673}- What did you do with the princess?|- Donkey, I'm the princess.
{88675}{88741}- Aah!|- It's me, in this body.
{88743}{88804}Oh, my God!|You ate the princess!
{88806}{88852}- Can you hear me?|- Donkey!
{88854}{88910}- Listen, keep breathing! I'll get you out of there!|- No!
{88912}{88971}- Shrek! Shrek! Shrek!|- Shh.
{88973}{89017}- Shrek!|- This is me.
{89019}{89065}[ MUFFLED MUMBLING ]
{89140}{89209}Princess?
{89211}{89295}What happened to you?|You're, uh, uh,
{89297}{89343}uh, different.
{89345}{89399}- I'm ugly, okay?|- Well, yeah!
{89401}{89476}Was it something you ate? 'Cause|I told Shrek those rats was a bad idea.
{89478}{89539}- You are what you eat, I said. Now...|- No.
{89541}{89621}I... I've been this way|as lon as I can remember.
{89623}{89684}What do you mean? Look,|I am not never seen you like this before.
{89685}{89761}It only happens|when the sun goes down.
{89794}{89881}By night one way,|by day another.
{89883}{89932}This shall be the norm...
{89934}{90009}until you find|true love's first kiss...
{90011}{90117}and then take love's true form.
{90119}{90204}Ah, that's beautiful.|I didn't know you wrote poetry.
{90206}{90252}It's a spell.
{90254}{90316}[ SIGHS ]|When I was a little girl,
{90318}{90382}a witch cast a spell on me.
{90384}{90445}Every night I become this.
{90447}{90535}This horrible, ugly beast!
{90595}{90716}I was placed in a tower to await the day|my true love would rescue me.
{90718}{90780}That's why I have to marry|Lord Farquaad tomorrow...
{90782}{90864}before the sun sets|and he sees me...
{90894}{90965}like this. [ SOBS ]
{90967}{91045}All right, all right. Calm down.|Look, it's not that bad.
{91047}{91147}You're not that ugly.|Well, I am not gonna lie. You are ugly.
{91149}{91221}But you only look like this at night.|Shrek's ugly 24-7.
{91223}{91304}But, Donkey, I'm a princess,
{91306}{91392}and this is not how a princess|is meant to look.
{91394}{91484}Princess, how 'bout if you|don't marry Farquaad?
{91486}{91532}I have to.
{91534}{91602}Only my true love's kiss|can break the spell.
{91604}{91689}But, you know, um,|you're kind of an ogre,
{91691}{91773}and Shrek... well,|you got a lot in common.
{91775}{91811}Shrek?
{91813}{91905}Princess, I...|Uh, how's it going, first of all?
{91907}{91974}Good? Um, good for me too.
{91976}{92022}I'm okay.
{92024}{92141}I saw this flower and thought of you|because it's pretty and...
{92143}{92245}Well, I don't really like it, but I thought|you might like it 'cause you're pretty.
{92247}{92324}But I like you anyway.|I'd... uh, uh...
{92326}{92374}[ SIGHS ]
{92376}{92461}I'm in trouble.|Okay, here we go.
{92463}{92523}[ FIONA ]|I can't just marry whoever want.
{92525}{92580}Take a good look at me, Donkey.
{92582}{92628}I mean, really,
{92630}{92694}who could ever love a beast|so hideous and ugly?
{92696}{92754}Princess and ugly|don't go together.
{92756}{92814}That's why I can't stay here with Shrek.|[ GASPS ]
{92816}{92922}My only chance to live happily|ever after is to marry my truelove.
{92924}{93006}- [ DEEP SIGH ]|- Don't you see, Donkey?
{93008}{93087}That's just how it has to be.
{93089}{93162}It's the only way|to break the spell.
{93164}{93230}- You at least gotta tell Shrek the truth.|- No!
{93232}{93302}You can't breathe a word.|No one must ever know.
{93304}{93365}What's the point of being able to talk|if you gotta keep secrets?
{93366}{93432}Promise you won't tell. Promise!
{93434}{93508}All right, all right.|I won't tell him. But you should.
{93509}{93584}I just know before this is over, I'm gonna|need a whole lot of serious therapy.
{93584}{93669}- Look at my eye twitching.|- [ DOOR OPENS ]
{94127}{94211}[ SNORING ]
{94213}{94303}[ FIONA ]|I tell him, I tell him not.
{94314}{94410}I tell him, I tell him not.
{94412}{94458}I tell him.
{94460}{94510}Shrek!
{94512}{94573}Shrek, there's something|I want...
{94575}{94647}[ SNORING ]
{95072}{95125}Shrek.
{95159}{95208}- Are you all right?|- Perfect!
{95210}{95257}Never been better.
{95259}{95338}I... I don't...|There's something I have to tell you.
{95340}{95401}You don't have to tell me|anything, Princess.
{95403}{95453}- I heard enough last night.|- You heard what I said?
{95455}{95501}Every word.
{95503}{95555}I thought you'd understand.
{95557}{95603}Oh, I understand.
{95605}{95691}Like you said, Who could|love a hideous, ugly beast?
{95693}{95757}But I thought that|wouldn't matter to you.
{95759}{95801}Yeah? Well, it does.
{95803}{95861}[ GASPS, SIGHS ]
{95863}{95916}- Ah, right on time.|- [ HORSE WHINNIES ]
{95918}{95987}Princess, I've brought you|a little something.
{95989}{96091}♪ [ FANFARE ] ♪
{96093}{96181}[ YAWNS ]|What'd I miss? What'd I miss?
{96183}{96246}[ MUFFLED ] Who said that?|Couldn't have been a donkey.
{96279}{96338}Princess Fiona.
{96340}{96405}As promised. Now hand it over.
{96407}{96509}Very well, ogre. The deed|to your swamp, cleared out, as agreed.
{96511}{96620}Take it and go|before I change my mind.
{96622}{96690}Forgive me, Princess,|for startling you,
{96692}{96738}but you startled me,
{96740}{96828}for I have never seen|such a radiant beauty before.
{96830}{96902}I am Lord Farquaad.
{96904}{96997}Lord Farquaad? Oh, no, no.
{96999}{97070}[ SNAPS FINGERS ] - Forgive me,|my Lord, for I was just saying...
{97072}{97203}a short... farewell.
{97205}{97316}That is so sweet. You don't have|to waste good manners on the ogre.
{97318}{97364}It's not like it has feelings.
{97366}{97461}No, you're right. It doesn't.
{97463}{97559}Princess Fiona, beautiful, fair,|flawless Fiona.
{97561}{97633}- I ask your hand in marriage.|- [ GASPS ]
{97635}{97756}Will you be the perfect bride|for the perfect groom?
{97835}{97959}Lord Farquaad, I accept.|Nothing would make...
{97961}{98037}Excellent! I'll start the plans,|for tomorrow we wed!
{98039}{98085}No! I mean, uh,
{98087}{98144}why wait?
{98146}{98238}Let's get married today|before the sun sets.
{98240}{98305}Oh, anxious, are we?|You're right.
{98307}{98401}The sooner, the better.|There's so much to do!
{98403}{98459}There's the caterer,|the cake, the band, the guest list.
{98461}{98533}Captain, round up some guests!
{98535}{98600}[ FIONA ] Fare-thee-well, ogre.
{98602}{98664}Shrek, what are you doing?|You're letting her get away.
{98666}{98731}- Yeah? So what?|- Shrek, there's something about her you don't know.
{98733}{98791}Look, I talked to her|last night. She's...
{98793}{98890}I know you talked to her last night.|You're great pals, aren't ta?
{98892}{98982}Now, if you two are such good friends,|why don't you follow her home?
{98984}{99031}Shrek, I... I wanna go with you.
{99033}{99104}I told you, didn't I?|You're not coming home with me.
{99106}{99201}I live alone!|My swamp! Me! Nobody else!
{99203}{99253}Understand? Nobody!
{99255}{99371}Especially useless, pathetic,|annoying, talking donkeys!
{99373}{99449}- But I thought...|- Yeah. You know what?
{99451}{99504}You thought wrong!
{99546}{99592}Shrek.
{99731}{99827}♪ I heard there was ♪|♪ a secret chord ♪
{99829}{99902}♪ That David played ♪|♪ and it pleased the Lord ♪
{99904}{100020}♪ But you don't really ♪|♪ care for music, do ta ♪
{100062}{100142}♪ It goes like this ♪|♪ the fourth, the fifth ♪
{100144}{100205}♪ The minor fall ♪|♪ the major lift ♪
{100207}{100366}♪ The baffled king ♪|♪ composing hallelujah ♪
{100368}{100446}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{100448}{100530}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{100532}{100626}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{100628}{100742}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{100788}{100872}♪ Baby, I've been here before ♪
{100874}{100949}♪ I know this room ♪|♪ I've walked this floor ♪
{100951}{101073}♪ I used to live alone ♪|♪ before I knew you ♪
{101114}{101188}♪ I've seen your flag ♪|♪ on the marble arch ♪
{101190}{101270}♪ But love is not ♪|♪ a victory march ♪
{101272}{101378}♪ It's a cold ♪|♪ and it's a broken hallelujah ♪
{101417}{101492}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{101494}{101569}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{101571}{101644}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{101646}{101778}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{101820}{101912}♪ And all I ever ♪|♪ learned from love ♪
{101914}{101971}♪ I show to shoot at someone ♪
{101973}{102035}♪ - Who outdrew you ♪|♪ - [ MOANING ] ♪
{102037}{102126}♪ And it's not a cry ♪|♪ you can hear at night ♪
{102128}{102201}♪ It's not somebody ♪|♪ who's seen the light ♪
{102203}{102372}♪ - It's a cold and it's a ♪|♪ broken hallelujah - [ MOANING ] ♪
{102374}{102441}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{102443}{102521}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{102523}{102601}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{102603}{102761}♪ Hallelujah ♪
{102847}{102919}[ THUMPING SOUND ]
{102960}{103008}Donkey?
{103010}{103063}- [ GRUNTS ]|- What are you doing?
{103065}{103136}I would think, of all people, you would|recognise a wall when you see one.
{103138}{103184}Well, yeah.
{103186}{103267}But the wall's supposed|to go around my swamp, not through it.
{103269}{103336}It is around your half. See,|that's your half, and this is my half.
{103338}{103400}Oh! Your half. Hmm.
{103402}{103463}Yes, my half.|I helped rescue the princess.
{103465}{103519}I did half the work,|I get half the booty.
{103521}{103601}Now hand me that big old rock,|the one that looks like your head.
{103603}{103659}- Back off!|- No, you back off.
{103661}{103709}- This is my swamp!|- Our swamp.
{103711}{103757}- Let go, Donkey!|- You let go.
{103759}{103806}- Stubborn jackass!|- Smelly ogre.
{103808}{103861}Fine!
{103863}{103943}- Hey, come back here. I'm not through with you yet.|- Well, I'm through with you.
{103945}{104023}Uh-uh. You know,|with you it's always, Me, me, me!
{104025}{104087}Well, guess what!|Now it's my turn!
{104089}{104140}So you just shut up|and pay attention!
{104142}{104189}You are mean to me.
{104191}{104251}You insult me and you don't|appreciate anything that I do!
{104253}{104327}You're always pushing me around|or pushing me away.
{104329}{104421}Oh, yeah? Well, if I treated you|so bad, how come you came back?
{104423}{104500}Because that's what friends do!|They forgive each other!
{104502}{104579}Oh, yeah. You're right, Donkey.
{104581}{104682}I forgive you...|for stabbing me in the back!
{104684}{104814}Ohh! You're so wrapped up in layers, onion|boy, you're afraid of your own feelings.
{104816}{104899}- Go away!|- There you are, doing it again just like you did to Fiona.
{104901}{104963}All she ever do was like you,|maybe even love you.
{104965}{105064}Love me? She said I was ugly,|a hideous creature.
{105066}{105112}I heard the two of you talking.
{105114}{105160}She wasn't talking about you.
{105162}{105218}She was talking about, uh,|somebody else.
{105279}{105337}She wasn't talking about me?
{105339}{105394}Well, then who was|she talking about?
{105396}{105462}Uh-uh, no way. I am not saying anything.|You don't wanna listen to me.
{105463}{105518}- Right? Right?|- Donkey!
{105520}{105581}- No!|- Okay, look.
{105583}{105629}I'm sorry, all right?
{105668}{105714}Humph.
{105746}{105833}[ SIGHS ] I'm sorry.
{105835}{105937}I guess I am just a big,|stupid, ugly ogre.
{105966}{106013}Can you forgive me?
{106066}{106112}Hey, that's what friends|are for, right?
{106114}{106178}Right. Friends?
{106180}{106226}Friends.
{106228}{106299}So, um,
{106301}{106355}what did Fiona say about me?
{106357}{106432}What are you asking me for?|Why don't you just go ask her?
{106434}{106506}The wedding!|We'll never make it in time.
{106508}{106585}Ha-ha-ha! Never fear, for where|there's a will, there's a way,
{106587}{106638}and I have a way. [ WHISTLES ]
{106743}{106802}- Donkey?|- [ DONKEY LAUGHING ]
{106804}{106861}I guess it's just|my animal magnetism.
{106863}{106939}[ LAUGHING ] Aw, come here, you.
{106941}{107008}All right, all right. Don't get|all slobbery. No one likes a kiss ass.
{107010}{107071}All right, hop on|and hold on tight.
{107073}{107157}I haven't had a chance to|install the seat belts yet.
{107311}{107371}[ DONKEY LAUGHING ] Whoo!
{107695}{107788}[ BELLS TOLLING ]
{107863}{107914}[ ALL GASPING ]
{107916}{107977}People of DuLoc,
{107979}{108043}we gather here today...
{108045}{108094}to bear witness...
{108096}{108142}- to the union...|- Um...
{108144}{108203}- Of our new king...|- Excuse me.
{108205}{108269}- Could we just skip ahead to the I do's?|- [ CHUCKLING ]
{108271}{108317}Go on.
{108438}{108525}Go ahead, have some fun. If we|need you, I'll whistle. How about that?
{108588}{108634}Shrek, wait, wait!|Wait a minute!
{108636}{108700}- You wanna do this right, don't you?|- What are you talking about?
{108702}{108748}There's a line you|gotta wait for.
{108750}{108810}The preacher's gonna say, Speak now|or forever hold your peace.
{108812}{108902}- That's when you say, I object!|- I don't have time for this!
{108904}{108945}Wait. What are you doing?|Listen to me!
{108947}{108993}- Look, you love this woman, don't you?|- Yes.
{108995}{109026}- You wanna hold her?|- Yes.
{109028}{109081}- Please her?|- Yes!
{109083}{109146}♪ Then you got to, got to ♪|♪ try a little tenderness ♪
{109148}{109214}- The chicks love that romantic crap!|- All right! Cut it out.
{109216}{109303}- When does this guy say the line?|- We gotta check it out.
{109305}{109381}- [ DONKEY GRUNTING ]|- And so, by the power vested in me,
{109383}{109461}- [ SHREK ] What do you see?|- The whole town's in there.
{109463}{109538}- I now pronounce you husband and wife,|- They're at the altar.
{109540}{109601}- King and queen.|- Mother Fletcher! He already said it.
{109603}{109666}- Oh, for the love of Pete!|- [ GRUNTS ]
{109696}{109745}I object!
{109747}{109797}- Shrek?|- [ GASPS ]
{109799}{109845}Oh, now what does he want?
{109847}{109929}[ CROWD CLAMOURING ]
{109931}{110004}Hi, everyone.|Having a good time, are ta?
{110006}{110059}I love DuLoc, first of all.
{110061}{110121}- Very clean.|- What are you doing here?
{110123}{110193}Really, it's rude enough|being alive when no one wants you,
{110195}{110275}- but showing up uninvited to a wedding...|- Fiona!
{110277}{110349}- I need to talk to you.|- Oh, now you wanna talk?
{110351}{110422}It's a little late for that,|so if you'll excuse me...
{110424}{110481}- But you can't marry him.|- And why not?
{110483}{110576}Because... Because he's just|marrying you so he can be king.
{110578}{110635}Outrageous!|Fiona, don't listen to him.
{110637}{110724}- He's not your true love.|- And what do you know about true love?
{110726}{110783}Well, I... Uh...
{110785}{110866}- I mean...|- Oh, this is precious.
{110868}{110980}[ CHUCKLING ] The ogre|has fallen in love with the princess!
{110982}{111036}- Oh, good Lord.|- [ CROWD LAUGHING ]
{111038}{111084}An ogre and a princess!
{111086}{111164}[ LAUGHING CONTINUES ]
{111219}{111279}Shrek, is this true?
{111313}{111374}Who cares? It's preposterous!
{111376}{111463}Fiona, my love, we're but a kiss away|from our happily ever after.
{111465}{111527}Now kiss me! Mmmm!
{111625}{111705}By night one way,|by day another.
{111751}{111817}I wanted to show you before.
{112270}{112356}- [ WHIMPERS ]|- [ CROWD GASPING ]
{112358}{112419}Well, uh,
{112421}{112469}that explains a lot.
{112471}{112559}[ FARQUAAD ] Ugh! It's disgusting!
{112561}{112610}Guards! Guards!
{112612}{112688}I order you to get that|out of my sight now! Get them!
{112690}{112757}- Get them both!|- No, no!
{112759}{112849}This hocus-pocus alters nothing. This|marriage is binding, and that makes me king!
{112851}{112906}- See? See?|- No, let go of me! Shrek!
{112907}{112958}No! - [ FARQUAAD ] Don't just|stand there, you morons.
{112958}{113019}Get out of my way! Fiona!
{113076}{113136}Arrgh!
{113138}{113210}I'll make you regret the day we met.|I'll see you drawn and quartered!
{113212}{113282}- You'll beg for death to save you!|- No! Shrek!
{113284}{113368}- And as for you, my wife,|- Fiona!
{113370}{113434}I'll have you locked back in that tower|for the rest of your days!
{113436}{113480}- I am king!|- [ WHISTLES ]
{113482}{113573}I will have order!|I will have perfection! I will have...
{113604}{113677}Aaah!
{113679}{113745}- Aah!|- All right. Nobody move.
{113747}{113797}I got a dragon here,|and I'm not afraid to use it.
{113799}{113862}- [ DRAGON ROARS ]|- I'm a donkey on the edge!
{113896}{113972}- [ BELCHES ]|- [ DONKEY LAUGHS ]
{113974}{114032}Celebrity marriages.|They never last, do they?
{114034}{114082}[ CHEERING ]
{114084}{114128}Go ahead, Shrek.
{114161}{114216}Uh, Fiona?
{114243}{114296}Yes, Shrek?
{114298}{114395}I... I love you.
{114397}{114451}Really?
{114477}{114549}Really, really.
{114551}{114597}I love you too.
{114728}{114768}[ ALL ] Aawww!
{114814}{114892}[ FIONA'S VOICE ] Until you|find truelove's first kiss...
{114894}{114973}[ ECHOING ]|and then take love's true form.
{115538}{115608}[ ECHOING CONTINUES ] Take love's|true form. Take love's true form.
{115756}{115816}Fiona?
{115876}{115938}Fiona.
{115940}{116001}Are you all right?
{116003}{116049}Well, yes.
{116051}{116129}But I don't understand.
{116131}{116182}I'm supposed to be beautiful.
{116247}{116301}But you are beautiful.
{116303}{116356}[ CHUCKLES ]
{116362}{116421}I was hoping this would be|a happy ending.
{116512}{116618}♪ I thought love was only true ♪|♪ in fairy tales ♪
{116620}{116655}[ ALL ] Oy!
{116657}{116746}♪ Meant for someone else ♪|♪ but not for me ♪
{116804}{116875}♪ Love was out to get me ♪
{116877}{116944}♪ That's the way it seemed ♪
{116946}{117053}♪ Disappointment ♪|♪ haunted all my dreams ♪
{117055}{117134}♪ And then I saw her face ♪
{117136}{117203}♪ Now I'm a believer ♪
{117205}{117266}♪ And not a trace ♪
{117268}{117334}♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪
{117336}{117433}♪ - I'm in love ♪|♪ - Ooh-ahh ♪
{117435}{117494}♪ I'm a believer ♪|♪ I couldn't leave her ♪
{117496}{117549}♪ If I tried ♪
{117551}{117648}God bless us, every one.
{117650}{117735}♪ Come on, y'all! ♪|♪ Then I saw her face Ha-ha! ♪
{117737}{117812}♪ Now I'm a believer ♪|♪ Listen! ♪
{117814}{117881}♪ Not a trace ♪
{117883}{117950}♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪
{117952}{118030}♪ I'm in love ♪|♪ Ooh-ahh ♪
{118032}{118134}♪ I'm a believer ♪|♪ I couldn't leave her if I tried ♪
{118136}{118205}- Ooh!|- Uh!
{118207}{118269}♪ Then I saw her face ♪
{118271}{118342}♪ Now I'm a believer ♪|♪ Hey! ♪
{118344}{118411}♪ Not a trace ♪|♪ Uhh! Yeah. ♪
{118413}{118491}♪ Of doubt in my mind ♪|♪ One more time! ♪
{118493}{118602}♪ I'm in love ♪|♪ I'm a believer ♪
{118604}{118648}Come on!
{118650}{118696}♪ I believe, I believe ♪|♪ I believe, I believe ♪
{118698}{118762}♪ I believe, I believe ♪|♪ I believe, I believe, I believe, hey ♪
{118764}{118826}♪ Y'all sing it with me! ♪|♪ I ♪
{118828}{118868}♪ Believe ♪
{118870}{118941}♪ I believe ♪|♪ People in the back! ♪
{118943}{119013}♪ - I believe ♪|♪ - I'm a believer ♪
{119015}{119086}♪ I believe ♪
{119088}{119157}♪ I believe ♪
{119159}{119265}♪ I believe ♪
{119267}{119321}[ HYSTERICAL LAUGHING ]
{119323}{119377}Oh, that's funny. Oh. Oh.
{119379}{119442}I can't breathe.|I can't breathe.
{119464}{119519}♪ I believe in self-assertion ♪
{119521}{119573}♪ Destiny or ♪|♪ as light diversion ♪
{119575}{119678}♪ Now it seems ♪|♪ I've got my head on straight ♪
{119680}{119731}♪ I'm a freak ♪|♪ an apparition ♪
{119733}{119784}♪ Seems I've made ♪|♪ the right decision ♪
{119786}{119873}♪ To try to turn back now ♪|♪ it might be too late ♪
{119875}{119979}♪ - I want to stay home today ♪|♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪
{119981}{120085}♪ - If anyone comes to play ♪|♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪
{120087}{120191}♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪|♪ - Don't want no company ♪
{120193}{120252}♪ No way ♪
{120254}{120318}♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
{120320}{120373}♪ I wanna be a millionaire ♪|♪ some day ♪
{120375}{120427}♪ But know what it feels like ♪|♪ to give it away ♪
{120429}{120511}♪ Watch me march ♪|♪ to the beat of my own drum ♪
{120513}{120575}♪ And it's off to the moon ♪|♪ and then back again ♪
{120577}{120627}♪ Same old day ♪|♪ Same situation ♪
{120629}{120729}♪ My happiness rears back ♪|♪ as if to say ♪
{120731}{120834}♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪|♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪
{120836}{120941}♪ - If anyone comes my way ♪|♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪
{120943}{121049}♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪|♪ - Don't want no company ♪
{121051}{121110}♪ No way ♪
{121112}{121175}♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
{121267}{121383}♪ I wanna stay home ♪|♪ stay home, stay home ♪
{121385}{121506}♪ - I wanna stay home today ♪|♪ - Don't wanna go out ♪
{121508}{121611}♪ - If anyone comes to play ♪|♪ - Gonna get thrown out ♪
{121613}{121681}♪ I wanna stay home today ♪
{121683}{121779}♪ Don't want no company ♪|♪ No way ♪
{121781}{121849}♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
{122180}{122275}♪ I get such a thrill ♪|♪ when you looking my eyes ♪
{122277}{122377}♪ My heart skips a beat ♪|♪ Girl, I feel so alive ♪
{122379}{122469}♪ Please tell me, baby ♪|♪ if all this is true ♪
{122471}{122569}♪ 'Cause deep down inside ♪|♪ all I wanted was you ♪
{122571}{122665}♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪|♪ Makes me wanna dance ♪
{122667}{122760}♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪|♪ It's a new romance ♪
{122762}{122857}♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪|♪ I look into your eyes ♪
{122859}{122952}♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪|♪ The best years of our lives ♪
{122954}{123045}♪ When we first met ♪|♪ I could hardly believe ♪
{123047}{123142}♪ The things that would happen ♪|♪ and we could achieve ♪
{123144}{123233}♪ So let's be together ♪|♪ for all of our time ♪
{123235}{123328}♪ Oh, girl, I'm so thankful ♪|♪ that you are still mine ♪
{123330}{123380}♪ You always consider me ♪|♪ like an ugly duckling ♪
{123382}{123442}♪ And treat me like a Nostradamus ♪|♪ was why I had to get my shine on ♪
{123443}{123493}♪ I break a little something ♪|♪ to keep my mind on ♪
{123494}{123552}♪ 'Cause you had my mind gone ♪|♪ Eh-eh, eh-eh, eh-eh ♪
{123554}{123622}♪ Turn the lights on, Come on, baby ♪|♪ Let's just rewind the song ♪
{123624}{123689}♪ 'Cause all I want to do is ♪|♪ make the rest years the best years ♪
{123690}{123725}♪ All night long ♪
{123727}{123816}♪ - Oh-oh-oh, makes me wanna dance ♪|♪ - Makes me wanna dance ♪
{123818}{123912}♪ - Oh-oh-oh, it's a new romance ♪|♪ - It's a new romance ♪
{123914}{123990}♪ - Oh-oh-oh, I look into your eyes ♪|♪ - Oh, yeah, yeah ♪
{123992}{124056}♪ - Look into your eyes ♪|♪ - Oh-oh-oh ♪
{124058}{124118}♪ - The best years of our lives ♪|♪ - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
{124119}{124200}♪ - Oh-oh-oh, makes me wanna dance ♪|♪ - Whoa-oh-oh, dance, yeah ♪
{124202}{124296}♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪|♪ It's a new romance ♪
{124298}{124393}♪ - Oh-oh-oh, I look into your eyes ♪|♪ - Look into your eyes, yeah ♪
{124395}{124506}♪ Oh-oh-oh ♪|♪ The best years of our lives ♪
{124508}{124576}♪ Everything looks bright ♪
{124578}{124632}♪ Standing in your light ♪
{124634}{124690}♪ Everything feels right ♪
{124692}{124766}♪ What's left is out of sight ♪
{124768}{124878}♪ What's a girl to do I'm ♪|♪ telling you You're on my mind ♪
{124880}{124942}♪ I wanna be with you ♪
{124944}{124999}♪ 'Cause when you're ♪|♪ standing next to me ♪
{125001}{125047}♪ It's like wow ♪
{125049}{125124}♪ And all your kisses ♪|♪ seem to set me free ♪
{125126}{125170}♪ It's like wow ♪
{125172}{125252}♪ And when we touch it's such ♪|♪ a rush I can't get enough ♪
{125254}{125318}♪ It's like... It's like ♪|♪ Ooh-ooh ♪
{125320}{125381}♪ Hey, what ♪
{125383}{125462}♪ It's like wow ♪|♪ Ooh-ooh, hey ♪
{125464}{125542}♪ Hey, yeah ♪|♪ It's like wow ♪
{125544}{125631}♪ Everything is looking ♪|♪ right now, right now ♪
{125633}{125710}♪ - It's like wow ♪|♪ - And I got this feeling ♪
{125712}{125781}♪ This feeling ♪|♪ it's just like wow ♪
{125783}{125837}♪ It's just like wow ♪
{125839}{125886}♪ - You are all I'm thinking of. ♪|♪ - Like wow ♪
{125888}{125993}♪ Everything feels right ♪|♪ Everything feels right ♪
{125995}{126053}♪ - Like wow ♪|♪ - Everything looks bright ♪
{126055}{126117}All my senses are right.
{126119}{126176}♪ - Like wow ♪|♪ - Everything feels right ♪
{126178}{126258}♪ Baby, baby, baby ♪|♪ the way I'm feeling you ♪
{126260}{126306}♪ Is like wow ♪
{126308}{126378}♪ [ INSTRUMENTAL ] ♪
{126800}{126885}♪ There is something ♪|♪ that I see ♪
{126887}{126969}♪ In the way ♪|♪ you look at me ♪
{126971}{127053}♪ There's a smile ♪|♪ There's a truth ♪
{127055}{127137}♪ In your eyes ♪
{127139}{127219}♪ What an unexpected way ♪
{127221}{127302}♪ On this unexpected day ♪
{127304}{127350}♪ Could it be ♪
{127352}{127470}♪ This is where I belong ♪
{127472}{127553}♪ It is you I have loved ♪
{127555}{127627}♪ All along ♪
{127629}{127718}♪ There's no more mystery ♪
{127720}{127803}♪ It is finally clear to me ♪
{127805}{127893}♪ You're the home ♪|♪ my heart's searched for ♪
{127895}{127967}♪ So long ♪
{127969}{128055}♪ It is you I have loved ♪
{128057}{128151}♪ All along ♪
{128803}{128895}♪ Whoa, over and over ♪
{128897}{129019}♪ I'm filled with emotion ♪
{129021}{129092}♪ As I look ♪
{129094}{129205}♪ Into your perfect face ♪